My first post..........again

Hello everyone.  I'm back.  

This has been a challenging first step (again) for me.  Let's see............my last blog was good.  It helped me a great deal.  At that point that I stopped blogging about my journey I had lost 58 pounds, was engaged to be married, loved my job.........life was good.

What a difference a couple of years make..............all I can say is life happens.

I'm not married. I gained back all of the weight I worked to lose.  My journey stopped.  My marriage did not happen, my job I loved disappeared, and my mother got ill.  I fell back into old habits and started using food again as my comfort, my friend; my always faithful, never let me down constant in my life.  Slowly the weight came back. Failure again.

After a lot of "stuff" happening, that I'm sure will come out in future blogs, I was exhausted, lonely, sad, still putting a fake smile on every day, still existing.  In November 2014 I started a program.  A wonderful program that helped body, mind, and soul.  This program was it.......it was THE ONE!!!  I started out doing well, lost some weight although I did not weight myself for fear of looking at the number on the scale.  I went on vacation, lived it up, had the time of my life!  I had every intention of jumping with both feet right back into that program and charging forward..............until.................I get home from vacation and discover my mother very ill again; not enough strength to stand up.  I take her to the emergency room, what she was diagnosed with was not all that serious.  I figured some antibiotics and she would be good to go.  That is not what happened.  She was admitted to the hospital and 3 days later the hospital was ready to discharge her except for one little thing.........she was still disoriented..........she still could not stand up on her own..........OMGoodness now what???  Thankfully, she was admitted to a rehab facility and spent 3 weeks doing the rehabilitation.  During that time, I went to the rehab daily. On days that I worked, I went after work.  Also during that time my mom could not remember my name and on several occasions while knowing I was family and someone that loved her, she did not know who I was.  She was very, very out of it.  Thankfully, she rehabilitated well and was able to go home!!!  Once back home, her confusion went away.  My point being, a very stressful time.  During this time, I turned to my trusty friend food for comfort.  

The day after Christmas, I looked at the program I had begun several weeks earlier and decided - - I MUST LOSE WEIGHT - I MUST CHANGE MY LIFE FOR THE FINAL TIME.  I reached out to my life coach/personal trainer/all around awesome person and told her that I did what I always do and start out strong, let life get in my way, and fall back to the same old same old............She was understanding, supportive, and there for me!  That was the final piece I was missing.  I have been driving her crazy with my texting questions and she has been great.  My questions though are different this time.  My questions are about how to improve, how to exercise properly, modifying some of the workouts to suit my current weight and body size. She has been a huge difference for me and my success thus far and my success at the end of my journey.  The shift is happening!!!  I can feel myself changing!

I hope you follow me on this journey.  I hope you join along with me.  I hope when I run my first 5K that I will have people there running along side me......there is plenty of room on my journey for others!  Let's do this.........I can't wait to see where this journey takes me.  

My stats:  Weight lost thus far: 19 pounds.